So, I get back from meeting my admirer, and go home, in order to ask my mum why on earth she told him where I was. I mean if you can't rely on your mum for help and advice on these occasions what are you going to do?

To my surprise, waiting for me was a large box of black magic chocolates in a heart shape, and a bunch of red roses.

Now at this point I am slightly embarrassed, because it looks like he thought I was worth a bit of effort after all, and I had just been quite rude to him. The roses didn't die for quite a while either, so maybe he even bought them from somewhere reputable. (Though they could have been fresh from somebody's garden.)

In actual fact, I felt so guilty about the whole thing, that I took the chocolates in to my youth group and shared them with everybody. Of course I shared the story as well. I have since been told that I am resolved of all guilt for this, because the story comes under the heading of being funnier than it is cruel. So that's alright then.

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The problem here is that the the roses and the chocolates were left for me at my house. Where I wasn't. This means that I didn't know about them. Now I'm not saying that had they been presented them to me at the time of decision making I would necessarily have changed my mind, but it might have swayed me a little bit. I might have been a little less rude. I might have been nice at least until I had eaten them.

What is never going to happen is that a girl gets home, discovers the gifts, and calls you up to say how wrong she was. Although she might call her friends up to tell them how nice the chocolates were. Mmmm. Chocolates.